Waking this morning returned me to painful consiousness. The psychological displacement of moving is disconcerting. Waking in a strange unexpected place. A feeling of depression descended until Dook lept on to the bed and reminded me of my responsibilities. Chemical support may get the job done but leaves a depletion of serotonin and dopamine. My recent studies into ethylphenidate nearly killed me and brought online critisism from other, meeker researchers. But I am Skree and I have set standards the common man can not meet, I struggle to match them myself.
If you choose to have a sled dog you have to get up, however rough you feel and walk ten miles every morning. So we set out. The first real frost. Once out of town and in the field the sun paints the sky in oranges and colours that have no name. Across the valleys the fields are white with frost. I'm not well but I can't let physical discomfort over rule this beauty. A trace of AL-LAD afterglow from Saturday's trip is battling the eth come down.
We walk through woods as I contemplate how damaged I am. What to do for the best. Should I work or have my exertions hit their limits. I need rest. I really need a day of rest. There is only so much I can take. I've had little sleep and no proper food for days. I feel guilty neglecting my work but I'll break if I do much more. Forgive me this day. So very tired.
sleep is for puffs
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