Local Stories

Just for local readership.
Well a few things have happened in Skreeworld. Satans Claws dug deep in to my stomach and kidneys, hospitalised me. The evil of the creature is beyond comprehension. Spent christmas pissing blood rather than drinking the blood of christ. Still not drinking. Just antibiotics and codeine that don't work bevcause of the bupronorphine. A fine old mess. Coincidentally, whilst I was in hospital a few loose ends regarding Richards death have been tied up and laid to rest up in Leeds, hoping to go pay my respects soon.
Regarding our war with the evil Satans Claws, it hasn't escaped our attention that only people of pure evil drink in La Strada and it doesnt take a genius to see that la strada is an anagram of satan, nearly. Steps will be taken by Skreeworld to curtail the Lucification of Frome, ultimately La Strada will be destroyed.

On a lighter note , everyone has their favourite crap terrorist. Yesterdays thigh strapped wierd substance on the educated guy was pretty good. He got out a blanket when no one was looking, got a syringe, injected his leg strapping and set his leg on fire.He didn't even have the bottle to do it when the plane was in the sky. Now that is one crap terrorist.
Nevertheless he comes second. Fromes very own shoe bomber tried to blow up his own shoe whilst flying over the Atlantic.Fortunately staff saw him striking the swan vestas trying to light the bangers on his Nike. No one has got it out of him what he was trying to do blowing up his own shoe.
Being from Frome his campaign of martyrdom maywell have been directed against West Country heroes and princes of ciderdelia The Wurzles. The poster for thier, much anticipated gig at the Cheese and Grain, last time they played there we got to meet the kings of scrumpy and western, has been stolen. Skreeworld knows not by who. We considered stealing it ourselves but know this would have been just plain selfish.
The hunt for the poster has born a parallel with Polands recent quest to find the thieves of the Arbiet Macht Frei sign stolen from the entrance to Auschwitz. The townsfolk are enraged and once the culprits are found there is a veritable cornucopia of farmyard impliments with which to enact vengeance.