Claire, my partner, got her emphysema diagnosis about four years ago. We both know that this is a condition that does not go away. Like many of our generation she has COPD due to the smoking, homelessness, sitting round wood fires and other life style practices. In her case working in a dry cleaners didn't help either. If you google it you read that the average lifespan post diagnosis is five years. It has been hard for her not to succumb to the addictive behaviour that has been a constant problem throughout her life. About two years ago she was offered an operation to help her quality of life. A new treatment where the damaged areas of the lungs are snipped and sealed leaving the more healthy areas to work more freely. We were prepared for this. We knew it would be a difficult time for Claire and I would have to do a lot of caring for her as she recovered from the operation. But fate had other ideas in store. Over the last year Claire had lost about three stone in weight. She had found a lump in her throat. She had no energy. Stool tests revealed blood and blood tests are looking like something is seriously wrong with her. Her lifestyle hasn't changed making all this very worrying. We are currently awaiting the results from various tests but until she has these issues resolved and is strong again the Royal Brompton Hospital will not go ahead with her lung operation. She is terrified. All I can do is offer my support and promise to always be there. Two years back I had a cancer scare myself after some X-rays revealed sclerotic lesions. The doctors all looked flustered and fearful before I was passed as ok so I do know that the standard process is to let you get scared and then relieved. So nothing is known yet. However with the weight loss I think Claire may have cancer. I'm terrified myself so it's not a surprise she can't sleep. After three or four nights without sleep we all become paranoid but no tablets that we have are strong enough to knock her out. I love her very much and I'm not sure how I'd survive without her. But for now I must stay strong and reel off the usual philosophical inanities.
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