I hear the syrens swirling sounds wrapping round the house with autumn sunshine flooding through the window they fade. A window I made of mahogany and £160 worth of double glazing, supposedly In loo of rent though it seems I pay both ways. You do when you're skint, though. Everything costs double and the rabbid and dirty work here like injury lawyers and payday loan companies are the real bottom feeders. The real low life.
I split this trip by a night, picking up where I left off last night. Yesterday was our horror hour of poverty where what little comes in can't match the needs to go out. Furniture making, even if you are in the fortunate position I am, is no way to make a living. I was warned of this at the interviews for both colleges I studied at but in those young romantic times money never mattered. Still, at nearly fifty, money isn't of interest to me. Not if it is at the cost of your soul. Not if you sacrifice autonomy.
After not so much as smoking a cigarette for three years I find a fresh desire for psychedelics. Recent studies on the long term depressed have shown positive results. You could argue, and many close to me have, that with a fluctuating disposition regarding my mental health, that psychedelics are the last thing I should be doing. But if your thinking has fallen in to a rut, through depression or drugs or alcoholism, nothing reshuffles your hand of cards better than a trip. And this window of legality surely won't be open long. Quite why psychedelics, and other central parts to some peoples religions should be deemed such a threat when tobacco and alcohol are openly on sale is a question that ought to be addressed. The quality of the two remaining lysergoids AL-LAD and LSZ are very different but particularly good. The first is difficult to seperate from acid where as LSZ creeps up slowly and delivers a far milder experience. Ideal for both the novice and social occasions.
Gaining the confidence to abandon furniture and return to achedemia is hard. Such life changes always are. But there are some things I need to say before my mind goes the way of all old hippies. Well, I guess they are only just discovering what the damage, long term, if any was done by those pioneers of psychedelics. They'll be sitting in our old people's homes right now. Perhaps the opening of the third eye has protected them from the sadness of dementia.
It is, in fact, another area where psychedelic research has been done. The terminally ill report coming to terms with their demise after taking a trip. The pineal gland, the one associated with the bodies own natural DMT apparently floods the brain with the stuff at the point of death. Reports from near death experiences describe these trips, one that awaits us all. Which is perhaps the strongest argument against DMT. That it ought to be reserved for the big one we all one day face.
I've never really regarded psychedelics as drugs as such. The quantities of dosage are usually so minute as to be clearly a trigger rather than something that itself affects you. The worry now is the horrible chemicals being cooked up by chemists in China to order from Europe with subtle molecular alterations to get through loopholes in the law. Some of these are quite damaging and barbaric, as I can personally report. Clearly parallels with the dodgy hooch of the prohibition years that ruined so many lives.
A traveller girl said to me earlier this year, "we had all we needed, acid, mushrooms, cannabis, heroin for those unable to face their lives. Why bring in all these new and untested substances?". The answer is of course some kind of legalisation. It's what we do with alcohol and tobacco, so standards are set and people know what they are getting.
Drug policy has become like climate change. Something desperately in need of address yet caught up in the medians fashion system. They're no longer news. Beheading and the imagined threats of islamification have replaced them on the telly. In the good news, my generation, the trainspotting generation seem to be ageing, dieing off without a younger generation replacing them. Most junkies are are in their four ties and fifties now and the gear being sold of such poor quality it seems unlikely that the youth will follow that great folly. They face follies of their own in this wave of designer drugs. A new one a week some reports say though most must be crap as few catch on. At least they have the Internet, to compare notes and develope a working platform to weed out the real nasty stuff. I have a personal fear of the new wave of dissociative anaesthetics that are coming in to replace the ketamine they can't get. Methoxphenidine, dyphenadine. These sort of freakish substances.
The world moves on and our miss spent youth ceases to have any relevance to kids coming of age now.
No comments:
Post a Comment