Wednesday morning

From memory each reduction takes about four days though a 50% drop as I have begun withis a fair old chunk. Id like to get through the subbies before I drop benzos. Both together would be madness as I am not strong and able to cope with the sudden change from house dwelling to cold bordered van life in an instant.
Took a walk to the woods where I dug a small hole as my bowels return to functioning as straight folks do. Bury my waste. Lose a second pair of glasses. Come back to van for tea and write a long post but lose it all through fragile reception. Trying now to rewrite its bare bones.
Buzzards, my guardian angels since I left leeds at sixteen for Cornwall, play over the alley. Back then rare North of bristol. A red kite mobbed by crows. Back then Wales was their last stronghold. Spotting one a treasured gift. Reintroduction schemes, early ones in the children gorge would find me driving out to see them. Now, even my father in his tower block eyrie in seacroft leeds sees their overspill from harewood reintroduction. Round didcot they're almost like vermin so common. Still beautiful but it takes a goshawk, a harried, an osprey to fire the blood now.
Wildlife was a gift from my father. It renders anywhere interesting.
Tex, my husky shepherd cross, dead two years now nearly, returns to me in dreams. He walks quietly beside me, never far in my subconscious. Just as he helped me through heroin cold turkey. Forcing me up and out every day, to walk crippled and slow, hyper reality bursting all senses with overdoses of colour, sound and smell. I miss him now.